Without You
by Usa
Summary: Usagi tries to figure out a life without Mamoru. Set during the famous R break up.
1. Default Chapter

Title: Without You  
Author: Usa  
Rating: PG-13 (violence)  
E-mail addy: Usako 0@aol.com  
Disclaimer: All characters from Sailor Moon are property of NaokoTakeuchi, Kondasha Ltd, TOEI Animations, and Bandai. The song "Without You" was written by Natalie Maines and Eric Silver for the Dixie Chicks.  
  
  
~~~~~  
I've sure enjoyed the rain   
but I'm looking forward to the sun  
You have to feel the pain  
when you lose the love you gave someone  
I thought by now that time would take away these lonely tears  
I hope you're doing fine all alone  
but where do I go from here?  
Cause without you I've lost my way  
My heart's stuck in second place ooh  
Without you  
Somebody tell my head to try to tell my heart  
That I'm better off without you  
Cause baby I can't live... without you.  
  
~Without You, by Natalie Maines and Eric Silver  
  
***  
Without You  
Part 1  
***  
  
  
It's been two weeks now. Why can't I get over you? I don't know what to do anymore. My head tells me to forget about you but my heart doesn't want me to let you go. What have I done to cause you to leave me? Please tell me.   
  
I, Tsukino Usagi, have fallen in love, but he doesn't love me anymore. Or so he says. He told me it was all a big mistake. But why didn't he tell me to begin with? Did he want to hurt me? I shake my head furiously. No, that's not true. Mamo-chan did not want to hurt me! He couldn't have... "Wake up, Usagi! He did hurt you whether he wanted to or not!"  
  
Getting up from the park bench, I notice that it's 7:45. I'm going to be late for Rei's New Years Eve party at her aunt's house. She asked us all to be there around eight. Oh well, at least I know everything can't change. I sigh and head toward Azuba. About five minutes into the walk I realize why Mamo-chan broke up with me. "That's it! It has to be it!" It's because I'm such a crybaby and a ditz. He probably wants someone more like Rei or any of my other friends.   
  
"Help!" I suddenly hear a girl cry out. It was Chibiusa! To confirm that it was her, I saw a familiar pink light. Her moon beam!  
  
"I'm coming, Chibiusa! Moon Crystal Power... Make Up!"  
  
~~~~~  
  
When I arrived at the scene, I saw two of the Black Moon's evil sisters. Cooan and Petz. Petz was holding on to a squirming pink haired child. "Let her go, Petz!"  
  
"Why look, Cooan. If it isn't one of those Sailor Bimbos."  
  
"Oi oi. How annoying! Sailor Moon, do you realize that we are quite busy. And what kind of hairstyle is that?"  
  
I glared at them. "It doesn't matter! I am the Pretty suited Soldier of Love and Justice! Sailor Moon! In the name of the Moon! I shall punish you!"  
  
"You are so funny!" Petz said as the sisters laughed. "Droid, come out and play with Sailor Moon." Petz looked at me. "Moon Brat, consider this the last year you'll ever live to see."  
  
"Moon Tiara Action!" I cried out. My tiara sliced Cooan on the cheek which cause her to drop Chibiusa. "Run, Chibiusa!" The little girl didn't argue. "Now, Droid, it's you and me!"  
  
"Have fun!" Petz said, disappearing.  
  
"You'll pay for that, Sailor Moon! Droid, make sure you let her suffer!" Cooan yelled.  
  
"Hai!" the Droid replied. It was rather nasty looking.   
  
*Why do I have to fight in this fuku? It's freezing!* Shaking my head, I called for my Moon Scepter.   
  
"What are you going to do with that? Hit me across the head?" the Droid taunted.  
  
I smiled at it evilly. "No, that'd be too easy, wouldn't it?" I ran towards it. I had no idea what I was doing but since no one else was around (Not even Tuxedo Kamen) then I'd have to take matters into my own hands. "Sailor Kick!" I felt my boot connect with the Droid's head. Landing on my feet, I smiled with pride.  
  
"That wasn't very nice, little girl!" It hollered, blowing a cold wind towards me. I then felt it start to rain. As soon as the rain fell to the ground, it turned to ice. Then the Droid vanished.  
  
"Huh? Where'd it go?" I asked looking around.   
  
"Sailor Moon, behind you!" Chibiusa shouted.  
  
"Nani?" I screamed as the Droid pushed me onto the ice. I tried to stay balanced but I couldn't. I felt, and heard, my head hit the ice with a sickening crack. When I finally stopped sliding, I looked up at the Droid hovering over me. Turning my head with a wince, I saw the scepter lying barely within my reach. What was I going to do? Where was everyone? I hadn't called them on the communicators because I figured they'd see the moon beam. Suddenly, the scepter was in my hands. At that moment, I didn't care how it got there, I called out, "Moon Princess Halation!"  
  
I gingerly got up as the Droid and the ice dissipated. I knew that it wasn't such a good idea. My head was killing me. I clutched it in pain. "Sailor Moon, daijobu?"  
  
I opened my eyes and looked at Chibiusa. "Hai, arigatou, Chibiusa." Since she knows my identity, I detransformed and we headed to Rei's aunt's. "Uh, Chibiusa, what were you doing out so late?"  
  
"I-I wanted to go to Rei-chan's aunt's house too. Ikuko-mama told me that if you were still home that I could go. I followed you out here. Gomen ne, Usagi..." She said, trailing off.  
  
I patted her on the head. She can be so adorable at times, but it was a rare occasion. "It's okay, Chibiusa. Next time, just let me know. Come on, they're probably worried about us, ne?" Usagi leaned on the little girl, feeling a little dizzy.  
  
"Hai!"  
  
"And Chibiusa, don't say anything about what happened."  
  
"Demo, Usagi..."  
  
"Onegai?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

***  
Without You  
Part 2  
Disclaimers and such in Part 1  
***  
  
"That baka! Why even set a time for people when they don't come?"  
  
"Rei-chan, calm down. I'm sure Usagi-chan has a perfectly good reason," Ami replied.  
  
"Well, it can't be the new Sailor V game because Crown's is closed," Makoto said.  
  
Minako smiled sadly. "She's probably wondering around town thinking of Mamoru-san."  
  
"Eh?" the girls asked.  
  
"Think about it, minna. Mamoru-san broke up with Usagi-chan two weeks ago. Do you really think she'd get over it so soon? Especially considering the fact that they're destined to be together." Ami, Rei, and Makoto looked at their friend in shock. She was never so serious about anything before in her life. "Come on, you know I'm right! I'm the Senshi of Love, remember?"  
  
"Oi..." they muttered walking away.  
  
"Nani?"  
  
~~~~~~  
  
"Did you see that awesome fireworks display?"  
  
"Yeah, it was unbelievable! We have to tell Rei-san what a wonderful job her aunt did."  
  
Rei walked over just in time to hear. "What are you guys talking about?" she asked.  
  
"Oh, don't be so modest," Yuka said with a smile.  
  
"That was the best fireworks I've ever seen, Rei-san!" Mika chimed in. "It was pink and shined straight up to the moon. Fantastic!"  
  
"You're mistaken. My aunt didn't have fire... Wait, did you say it was pink and shined to the moon?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Kami-sama! Chibiusa-chan!"   
  
The girls watched in confusion as Rei ran off.  
  
~~~~~  
  
I was about to knock on the door when Rei tore it open. The other three were right behind her. "Usagi, Chibiusa-chan? Daijobu?"  
  
"We're fine, Rei-chan," I replied.  
  
"Usagi-chan, Mika-san and Yuka-san said they saw a pink light earlier. We thought it was Chibiusa-chan's moon beam," Makoto explained.  
  
"Iie," I told her. "Maybe it was someone's fireworks. Now, where's the food?" I weaved through the crowds to the snack table, but didn't stop there. I headed right to the rest room. "Oh, why didn't I just tell them what happened? Probably because I know Rei-chan would be mad at me for not calling anyway. I didn't have time to chat and tell them where the attack was happening!"   
  
I sighed and sat on the bathroom floor. I grabbed my head as pain coursed through it. *I should really get this checked out. What if Chibiusa needs me again? I can't be injured. She may be a brat and a half, but it's my job to protect her.* Resolving to tell the others what had occurred, I got up and tried searching for them. I finally spotted Ami. "Ami-chan..."  
  
"Usagi-chan, Chibiusa-chan told us what happened."  
  
"She did?"   
  
"Hai, I am very proud of you for handling Cooan, Petz, and a Droid all on your own. Before you know it, you won't need us anymore," she said with a smile.  
  
I blushed. "Domo yo, Ami-chan. Remember this, though. I'll always need all of you. Now and forever! You guys are my best friends in the whole world!"   
  
I looked down when I felt a tugging on my shirt. It was Chibiusa. "Usagi, you're not mad at me for telling them, are you?"   
  
"Iie, Chibiusa. In fact, I decided I needed to tell them. That's why I came looking for them."   
  
"Usagi-chan! Only one more hour left of 2000!" Minako said.  
  
I smiled and figured Chibiusa hadn't told them about my head injury. *Oh well, I'll tell them later.* We all danced and had a wonderful time. Finally, there were two minutes left.  
  
"Can you believe it! Another year over!" Makoto said. "I resolve to find my true love this year!"  
  
"And I resolve to help her out!" Minako replied with a grin.  
  
Rei said, " I resolve to figure out the mystery of the Black Moon!"  
  
"I resolve to study harder!" Ami exclaimed.   
  
"Ami-chan..." I groaned. They asked what my resolution was. "To change for the better... for Mamo-chan."  
  
There was silence all around except for the countdown. "10, 9,8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.... HAPPY NEW YEAR!"  
  
They were still staring at me as everyone toasted to the New Year. I couldn't take it anymore and ran off.  
  
~~~~~  
  
I hugged my coat tighter around me. It was freezing. If Mamo-chan was still with me he would have driven me home. "Mamo-chan..."  
  
"Usagi! You shouldn't be out this late," a voice scolded. I knew who it was without turning around. I kept walking as the car pulled up along side of me. "Come on, I'll take you home. You're gonna freeze to death."  
  
I stopped and turned to face him. "What do you care, Mamoru?" I screamed. "You can't even come out on New Years Eve to help me protect Chibiusa and now you're ordering me around? Leave me alone!" *No, don't leave me alone, I love you.*  
  
Quickening my pace, I headed home. Why didn't he realize that I really wanted him to stay?   
  
~~~~~  
  
When I got home, I went up the stairs to my room. I found Luna sound asleep on the pillow in the corner of the room. I sat on the edge of the bed. I didn't even bother turning the lights on because the moonlight came right through my window. Moonlight. Maybe the moonlight would soothe me. I stepped into it. Tears sprang to my eyes. "I can't..." I whispered, stepping out o f it. I then collapsed onto my bed, falling into a fitful sleep.  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Usagi-chan! Wake up, Usagi-chan!"  
  
"Huh? What is it, Luna?" I asked.  
  
"Sleepyhead, Ami-chan just called. There's a Droid at the end of your street. Get up!"  
  
I was wide awake at that and grabbed my henshin brooch off my dresser. "Moon Crystal Power... Make Up!"  



	3. Chapter 3

***  
Without You   
Part 3  
Disclaimers and such in Part 1  
***  
  
I arrived a few minutes after the other girls. "Minna, where's Chibiusa? I haven't seen her since the party."  
  
"Uh... well, we dropped her off at Mamoru-san's," Sailor Jupiter said.  
  
"There's no time to discuss this," Rei bit off. "We have a Droid to take care of!"  
  
"Right!"  
  
I watched as the Droid drained the energy of some of the late night partiers. "Stop right there, Droid!" It looked up at me. There was something oddly familiar about this one. "I am the Pretty suited Soldier of Love and Justice. Sailor Moon! In the name of the Moon, I shall punish you!"  
  
"You!" it drawled looking straight at me. "You're the one who killed my mother!" The Droid dropped the human and came after me.   
  
"Supreme Thunder!"  
  
"Crescent Beam!"  
  
Venus and Jupiter's attack hit him square on the chest, but that didn't stop it's pursuit of me! "Minna, help me out here!" I screamed as it chased me.  
  
"Burning Mandala!" Mars' attack seemed to make it angrier. Go figure, she has that effect on people.   
  
Before I could scream, the Droid grabbed my arm. "Sailor Moon!" the Senshi shouted.  
  
"Ha! I have your pretty solider of love and justice," the Droid said, mocking me. "I have to take out my revenge on someone for my mother's death!"   
  
*Tuxedo Kamen, where are you? I guess he doesn't love me...* "Wh-what are you going to do with me?" I asked.  
  
"Why I'm going to throw you, of course!"   
  
I shrieked as the Droid tossed me into a tree. The last thing I saw were four very angry Senshi.  
  
"Minna?" Mars said.  
  
"HAI!"  
  
"Mars Power!"  
  
"Mercury Power!"  
  
"Jupiter Power!"  
  
"Venus Power!"  
  
"SAILOR PLANET ATTACK!"  
  
Just as the Droid disintegrated, Tuxedo Kamen showed up. "Where the hell were you?" I heard Jupiter ask.  
  
"Sailor Jupiter, not now," Venus said, putting a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Sailor Moon needs us." Mars nodded and headed to Mercury, who was kneeling over me.  
  
"Fine," Jupiter growled. "But this isn't over yet, Masked Moron!"  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Usagi-chan, are you sure you're all right?" Ami asked me.  
  
"Ami-chan, for the hundreth time, I'm fine! I just wanna go home and get some sleep. Is that too much to ask?"  
  
"Does your head hurt? Maybe we should take you to the hospital," Minako suggested.  
  
"Iie. I'll be all right. Really." I realized that I wasn't going to convince these girls. "Fine, stay over. But, it'll be you guys dealing with my dad in the morning, not me!"  
  
Makoto sighed. "Okay, okay. We'll drop you off at your house, minus us, and leave you in the care of Luna."  
  
I grinned. I got my way!  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Ne, Usagi-chan, daijobu?"  
  
Yawning, I eyed her. "Luna, I wanna go to sleep. I'm too tired to stay awake!"  
  
"You have to stay awake for 24 hours. What if you have a concussion?"  
  
"Luna, I'm gonna fall asleep whether I should or not. Maybe that means I do have a contusion, or whatever you called it."  
  
"Usagi..." I looked up to see Chibiusa in the doorway. "I think that this second bump on the head might have made the first one worse."  
  
"Nani yo?" Luna asked. "What is she talking about, Usagi-chan?"  
  
"Uh... well, you see..." I glared at Chibiusa then transferred it to Luna. "It wasn't that big a deal. Besides, I'm fine! I didn't have any problems with it."  
  
Chibiusa continued, not sensing that she totally messed the whole thing up. "Yes you did. Remember, you clutched your head in pain and almost collapsed after you killed that Droid." Unfortunately, that's when she realized she slipped. Putting a hand to her mouth, Chibiusa quickly, and wisely, left my room.  
  
"Usagi-chan! How could you not tell anyone this? Especially when you could have been killed either one of those times."  
  
"Too bad I wasn't," I muttered.  
  
"What was that?" Luna asked.  
  
I hadn't meant for her to hear me, but I guess she did. "What's the point of living, Luna? He hates me. I'm a disgrace to him, my parents, my friends and Senshi, and I'm a disgrace to you. Everyone who's still with me is staying out of a sense of loyalty. The girls believe that they have to protect their Princess. Well, why? The Princess isn't complete without her Prince anyway, so why worry about her?   
  
"And I'm not as smart as Shingo. He gets so much love and praise from my parents. I just don't feel like I get enough. What is wrong with me?"   
  
I sank to the floor and began to cry.  
  
~~~~~  
I went to the top of the stairs and listened to mama talk to the girls. "Gomen, but Usagi said she doesn't feel like going out this afternoon. She's been having dizzy spells and I'm really worried. Is she okay? Did something happen last night?"  
  
"Tsukino-san, Usagi slipped on a patch of ice and hit her head," Rei told her. "We thought she would have told you. Besides, she was fine last night after we dropped her off here."  
  
Mama put a hand to her head. "Oh, my poor baby. She never said anything this morning. I hope she doesn't have amnesia!"  
  
"Don't worry," Ami jumped in. "She probably didn't want to alarm you, that's all."  
  
"You're right, Ami-san. Arigatou. Thank you for taking care of Usagi. I will tell her you stopped by."  
  
"Sayonara, Tsukino-san."  
  
"Sayonara, girls." Mama looked at me. "Usagi. Why didn't you tell me?"  
  
"I don't know, mama."  
  
"Get dressed, we're going to the emergency room."  
  
"Demo, mama..."  
  
"Usagi!"  
  
"Hai."  
~~~~~  
  
Well, here I am. Lying in a hospital bed. Luna was right, I do have a compulsion, or whatever. This is really boring. I wonder if Rei will bring any of her Manga for me to read. I hope she brings some new editions of Evangelion! Evangelion... the only Manga Mamo-chan reads. Tears sprang to my eyes once again.   
  
"Usagi-chan!" Looking up, Minako came in with a movie, followed by Makoto with homebaked muffins, then Ami with textbooks, and Rei carrying a few Manga. "Ohayo! What did the doctor say was wrong with you?"  
  
"He said I have a confusion, or something."  
  
Ami laughed. "That's concussion, Usagi-chan."  
  
"Whatever. Mako-chan, some muffins if you please!"  
  
~~~~~  
  
As soon as the girls left, I felt slightly better. Slightly is an overstatement, I was down in the dumps. I was not excited about the new edition of Evangelion at all. The one thing I wanted wasn't there.   
  
"What did I do wrong, Mamo-chan?"   
  
Sighing, I picked up the Manga. And remembered the words to an American song I heard once. "'You have to feel the pain when you lose the love you gave someone. I thought by now that time would take away these lonely tears. I hope you're doing fine all alone, but where do I go from here?'"  
  
"Mamo-chan, where do I go from here?"  
  
The End.  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
